Monday, April 1, 2013

Salazar Brings Gift of ‘Monument’ to San Juans

Outgoing Interior Secretary Ken Salazar will lead ceremonies in Anacortes Monday morning and on Lopez Island Monday afternoon celebrating establishment of the San Juan Islands National Monument. The public is invited to both events.

Event organizers learned over the weekend that the Secretary will be unveiling three monument possibilities at the Monday celebrations. The options include a Stonehenge model, an Easter Island model, and a Fremont Troll model.

“To say we were a bit surprised is to put it mildly,” said one Lopez Island organizer not authorized to speak for the group Islanders for a National Conservation Area Now Called a National Monument (INCANCANM). “We thought a National Monument was, well, not quite like ‘Washington Monument,’ if you know what I mean.”

Neither Salazar’s office nor the offices of Senators Murray and Cantwell or Representatives Larsen and DelBene indicated any preference for what kind of monument would be appropriate for the San Juan Islands.

“I think something that shows some personality, like the Easter Island heads or the Fremont Troll, would be my preference,” said a Salazar staff member not authorized to comment. “But the Secretary’s a short timer, you know. Maybe you ought to try calling Sally Jewell?”

The staff member gave complete assurance that a lengthy process will be forthcoming to receive every last public comment before any decision is made. “That’s the way they do it in the islands, I hear. Thank goodness we didn’t have to establish a monument along the Seattle waterfront.”

--Mike Sato

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